#HeartOfAWriter#

....One day she dint mind that he had to leave in a haste after a phone call She was indifferent, she dint mind the call, she dint mind the haste, neither did she mind to watch him leave  .......She dint mind the awkward silence in the bloom of day. Neither did she try to break it..... But he wouldnt notice.... He wouldnt notice despite her not constantly nagging him for his attention. He dint notice her slowly drifting... Slowly she taught her mind not to care if he was constantly on his phone smiling while texting and consciously closing the phone when she is close enough.... She told herself to breath in and breath out and do something other than brew anger when he is running late or when he doesnt come at all She slowly saw him change in her eyes and she dint know what to do about it, and so she watched him from afar hoping whatever spell came on him would sooner than later be lifted and it could be him again... But that dint happen either, it was just that, a ...

Dad I woke up today with a million thoughts about you Thoughts of how great a Dad you were I was little then but am grown now and i cant help but wish you were here today How i could have nursed you enough to keep you to this day But i guess no amount of nursing could have kept you still when God wills Am a big girl now dad And  i know a pot of porridge with a squeeze of lemon really helps to boast appetite I know you never loved for us to see you at your lowest and you probably wouldnt even allow me to go through that for you But i would still, you know just how stubborn your daugther is And if it where now,  i would insist i be the one to treat you right Today am filled with all your loving memories Of how sweet a Dad you were Of how i each morning would come to your room for you to fix my collar And on how you would smile like you are trying so hard to stop it They say there only five steps of grief but i think there more than five for me Sadly i dont...

Here I am Laying right next to you, everything within wanting everything about you Yet my pride wont let me My pride tells me I will be deemed weak if I be the first to stretch out my hand and meet yours Dont mistake my ability to face my back at yours for strength, cause its not. Its the pain that continues to batter me for not ignoring my pride Ignoring the fact that we are all prone to era and that that just makes us perfectly flawed My heart is weak, yet my body keeps fighting my heart not to give in Not to tell you jst how much I  want you.... how much I need us intertwined like it would be dawn forever Right in your arms where i rightly belong Yet my pride tells me you are the man and you ought to make the first move... So days, weeks, months pass and here we are where we were 5months ago Because both our pride wont give in What happened to always and forever

Am jealous Please dont judge me but I am jealous I know yes you will tell me jealous is not of God. You should know that Norah,you are a christian But here I am telling the world am jealous What makes my jealous subject for criticism though? Is it cause I said it out? Wait. Are you saying it would have been christian if I was jealous but the world just dint I know about it? The only difference is that you know enough for you to judge But anyway, please dont judge me Cause I really am jealous I am jealous of how he loves you How he says your name with a smirk on his face Am jealous of how he loves your every being His love for you is written all over him. Literally... Well that's because he has enough shirts on with your name on each one of them Like he wears his love for you as a badge of honour Am jealous of the effort he puts just to make you happy How he stares in your eyes like he can see his entire future which is so blissful and certain Am jealous o...

Look at me, Tell me what you see I can hear you asking me why i look so low today I just smile and say maybe its cause am tired! Long day huh But deep down i know its only cause am scared Am scared of loving you Am scared of having you in my life and put a seal on it I tried dating someone that looks so much like you and we dint last We were drowning eachother and the only solution was to let go before we both drowned and died So each time i look at you its like dejavu So am scared to try, all i see in your eyes is innocense  or is it sadness or both You love me yes and i have no doubt about that. And i love you too But will i embrace it all or will it choke me and end up pushing you away? See right through me Look into my eyes and see within me Tell me? What do you see? Do you see a free spirited cheesy freely loving girl Or do you see the million times tomented girl that for so long failed to tame her heart to love Cause i sometimes see dejavu and i co...

Please!! Dont leave Maybe not just yet Believe me when i say its you i love, but i just dont know why its not you am with Sometimes i wake up in the darkest of dawn watch her sleep and i miss you I dont even knw why i am here i cant even put a finger on how we got here. Sometimes i sit and miss the days we were young and free. The days you wouldnt stop talking even when i didnot say a word. Those days when you where just enough for me, when not even the skimpest dresses driffted my eyes off you. Maybe that could have been the perfect time for you to leave. But then here we are...and am her's. I am not complaining. cause i have learnt to love her like i did with you and i am in a happy place. Not that am choosing her over you but it just happened and i have little control over my emotions lately. But it seems i might end up with her, and i know how much this hurts you so much you wanna leave, Leave me for her. I already got down on one knee for her, but maybe if tha...